Comments on: Are you Settling?

By: Nathan Colquhoun

Nathan Colquhoun — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 15:49:26 +0000

This post doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. I feel like you made 10 different statements all saying different things, or am I just reading this wrong? The way you write it is if that “settling” is something to be dreaded and only exists for people who are trying to escape being single. There is room to be complete whether in marriage, or being single. The separation you are describing between the two types of people has very little to do with the relationships they find themselves in and a lot more to do with who they are as people.

Dave is sort of on the right track, in that you can’t reduce relationships down to “waiting for the right one” lie. The only way to find out if the person is truely the right one is to date them anyway, therefore no longer being single and therefore making the whole idea of being single until the right one comes along a bad idea. Unless of course you actually believe that when you see her you will just know, but I know you don’t.

Settling is making a decision to commit your like to someone. Someone who doesn’t want to commit to someone will want to be single. Someone who does will eventually commit. Suggestion: Do a bunch of posts on this topic, try to come to some conclusions (for now) on what you are saying?

By: Dave

Dave — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 01:32:21 +0000

So to break down everything you said into a grossly exaggerated sound byte; There is no value to any relationship that you ever have (no matter if you “settle” or “one night” them) unless it is with that ONE person that is destined to be your true love for all eternity. Well, what happens if you one day miss out on the only opportunity to start a relationship with that ONE person and then they are gone, never to be seen by you again?

By: Amanda Griffith

Amanda Griffith — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:26:17 +0000

I wish I could write my thoughts like you do, Ron… You have no idea..

By: Sandra Gladwich

Sandra Gladwich — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:25:23 +0000

Great points Ron .. I think the key first and foremost is figuring out what makes you feel fulfilled just yourself – nothing else external to yourself – just you .. because if you can’t achieve completeness on your own you won’t be happy in any setting whether it’s single or in a relationship .. In my observations, sometimes it’s not so much about… Read More “escaping” from the single life but rather all to often people think the answer is external to themselves (”if I only had this”.. or “if I only had someone to make me happy or give me what I need”)… you can’t place that kind of expectation on things or other people… and yes society has these compartmental timeline expectations of us all – closed thinking that says if you fall outside of that, that there is something wrong ?? haha think again.

By: Nicole Clark

Nicole Clark — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 20:07:06 +0000

Comming from somone who knows about settling….It’s always a bad idea. You will never be truly happy.

By: Denise Esser

Denise Esser — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 20:06:49 +0000

Hear! Hear! I like being single for the most part. What I don’t like is when I feel like people are like, “Why are you still single after so many years?”

Anyone can settle. Not just anyone can be happily single!